BlogLaughs

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

Perez Hilton

While reviewing other celebrity blogs in the past, a few of our reviewers have remarked, “It’s OK, but it’s not as good as Perez Hilton.”

If memory serves, none of those people responded for this review.

Instead, the reviewers who rated Perez Hilton gave us every number from 0-10 in almost every category. The numbers are literally all over the place.

CONTENT – 6.3
“The stuff is kind of funny in a ‘look at me I'm gay and I love acting like a bitch’ sort of way. There are pictures with almost every post, so you at least have a visual connection to the insults the author is spouting about celebrities.”

“I enjoy the psychotic scrawl on the photos.”

“Gossip whores of the world worship Perez Hilton, though I still don't understand why. He is a Ted Casablanca wanna be. Equally as gay but not nearly as much style and class. He is the gossip goddess for the mean-spirited. About 90 percent of the time his ‘scoops’ turn out to be wrong, but when he is right, good lawd, watch for him flamboyantly screeching ‘I told you so’ all over his page! He has a lot of growing up to do. I find him incredibly boring compared to Eonline, Gawker, Defamer or various other gossip sites on the Web.”

“I'm going to have nightmares about that Cameron Diaz photo.”

“Ugh! I am not a big fan of celebrity blogs. I have one on my blogroll and it is not, nor will it ever be, this one. There are a few sincere posts scattered among mostly sophomoric and/or mean-spirited posts. Who needs this? Is this contributing anything to our lives? If so, it sure ain't the gift of laughter. I guess some people like this. I am not one of those people. This blog gets a lot of comments. I think that makes me sad. There are blogs that do this sort of thing so much better.”

“Perfect 10s are so boring, aren't they?”

“I know I seem mean. I guess this blog is okay for some people. Maybe the kind of mouth breathers who can't read the bigger words in People Magazine or can't pick up Entertainment Tonight on their stolen television set.”

“I’ve just had enough of the ‘snarky comments about celebrities’ sites. Here’s a big ‘who gives a shit!’”

DESIGN – 6.3
“With the amount of media attention this blog is getting, I figured it would be a better layout. The main header image is out of sync with the background (in both FireFox and IE7). The images even overlap the post boxes if they're too large. I guess the pink color fits the theme, but I just hate pink. Overall, better than most homemade Blogger templates.”

“It was really slow to load at home and at work. Both have fast connections.”

“The ads were a little too busy, but I liked the pink.”

“It's a good template and design for what it is supposed to be. It's attractive. I don't get hung up on ads or mumber of sidebars or stuff like that. It's clear and attractive and easy to read. If I liked the content, I would rank it higher. I still can't get past the content."

“While I love pink to death, he manages to make me hate it. The dual sidebars are annoying as hell. On the left, how wonderful he truly believes he is. On the right, ads ads ads ads...and ads with spelling errors no less, which doesn't surprise me as PH could use a class on spelling and grammar himself.”

“Professional, unique, clean layout.”

“Not bad, but the pink sucks. It’s just too gay for me.”

QUALITY OF WRITING/GRAMMAR – 6.5
“Pretty funny stuff, but for a guy who claims to have been part of a real journalistic publication before blogging, there are still too many grammar mistakes.”

“If spelling is truly not the mark of which intelligence should be rated upon, then PH is a genius. He makes so many spelling errors that I find it painful to read his column. His use of grammar is atrocious. Maybe it's intentional. Who knows.”

“Witty captions. Very relatable. Easy to digest and enjoy.”

“The words are spelled right. I'll give him that much.”

“It’s better than average for this sort of thing, but you have to be in the mood to read it.”

INTANGIBLES – 3.8
“Too many ads will make your readers go blind.”

“Lots of ads and it tried to make me download some ActiveX bullshit. I don’t think so.”

“I'm not sure why, but the intangibles of this blog are higher than the scores for the other areas. I guess a queen from LA who posts dozens of times per day on the latest celebrity gossip is more entertaining than watching it on Entertainment Tonight.”

“Ads. Ads. Ads. Ads. Ads. And that stupid cutsie poo writing thing he does on photographs. Argh. Hate it!”

“Very plugged into celebrity-ville.”

“I'm sorry. I just can't get past the content. I think my laptop is starting to smell. I need to get off this blog.”

FREQUENCY – 10.0
“More posts than you know what to do with.”

WOULD YOU READ THIS BLOG REGULARLY – 50% Yes
“Yes, but I think dlisted.com is better.”

“Nope.”

“I added it to my feed reader, but I'm sure I'll get tired of it pretty soon.”

“No. And I have to go bleach my corneas now for taking the time to review it.”

“Sure.”

“No, no, a thousand times no. If I am in the mood for this kind of humor I can just hang out at a bowling alley or a frat house."

OVERALL – 72.4

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